What Does it Really Mean to be Single

The world of singlehood is often misunderstood. This insightful interview with renowned social scientist Prof. Bella DePaulo, author of the groundbreaking book Single at Heart, directly confronts the pervasive societal narratives and subconscious biases that frequently cast single life in a negative light, often characterizing it as merely a deficient state compared to coupled life. Prof. DePaulo, who has dedicated her career to the rigorous, research-based study of single individuals, presents a compelling strengths-based perspective that acknowledges the richness, resilience, and fulfillment experienced by many who live single lives, particularly those who are “Single at Heart.”

Throughout the conversation, Prof. DePaulo systematically debunks numerous damaging myths. She confronts common misconceptions directly, addressing beliefs that single people are inherently lonely, less healthy, unfulfilled, perpetually waiting for “the one,” or somehow fundamentally lacking. Her research challenges assumptions about single parenting, the intimacy and sex lives of singles, and the often-feared prospect of growing old alone, offering counter-narratives grounded in empirical evidence. Beyond dismantling myths, the interview explores her pivotal concept of being “Single at Heart” – individuals for whom living single is their most authentic, meaningful, and fulfilling way to live. This distinction is crucial for clinicians and sexologists aiming to provide truly client-centered care. Prof. DePaulo offers practical guidance on how professionals can move beyond potentially harmful assumptions, develop more nuanced and empathetic approaches, identify clients who genuinely thrive in singlehood versus those struggling with it, and ask insightful questions to better understand their clients’ unique experiences. Essential listening for practitioners seeking to expand their perspective, challenge ingrained biases, and provide more inclusive, affirming care for their single clients. The interview concludes with a thought-provoking reflection on embracing the potential richness of a life not centered around a romantic partner.

Produced in 2025